Lily and James were gone. And they had taken with them all the happiness in the world.
He would never see either of them again. Memories flittered their way through his brain, Lily’s smile, James’ face when he made a joke. The last time he saw them, god James had looked so happy to see him…
Sirius Black was never one to cry but he found that his breath was coming in choked, pained gasps. As if in a daze he stepped forward into the house, sinking to his knees beside the body of his best friend. His glasses were askew and Sirius gently fixed them, staring
‘James…’ No more letters full to bursting of pictures of Harry and fatherly pride. No more playful, joking punches to the arm. No more laughter. No more Prongs.
‘You can’t…’ His voice broke, ‘James…’ It was more of a sob now and he remained on the floor, shaking.
But he had to keep going. Perhaps there was a chance someone had survived. There couldn’t be but… With what felt like all his remaining strength Sirius picked himself up, and ascended the stairs. If they were alive they would be in the nursery…
There lay Lily’s crumpled form and once again Sirius collapsed. No more gentle scoldings when he forgot to wipe his boots on the mat. No more teasing about how he and Remus ought to have tied the knot. No more warmth. No more Lily.
‘I’m sorry… Oh god I’m so sorry.’ This was his fault. His fault for not trusting Remus and for trusting Peter. It was his fault James and Lily were dead. Those were tears on his face but why bother wiping them away.
He couldn’t bring himself to look to the crib, to see Harry murdered just like his parents. However, at the sound of a whimper his head whipped around. Alive? Oh please. Oh please let him be alive. Shaking worse than ever Sirius pulled away a blanket to find Harry, confused, frightened and bleeding from his forehead but very much alive.
No longer even able to form words Sirius scooped up his godson, hugging the child to his chest. Harry was alive. Alive.
‘Shhh…’ Harry was still whimpering, ‘I’ve got you…’
He had to get Harry out of here. Out of this house, away from all this pain. Still holding his godson close to him, sheilding his eyes from the sight of his dead parents, he descended the stairs again and exited the house.
But where could he go from here?
Take him to Remus, he would know what to do. And then he had to go take care of his mistake.
However, before he could leave he heard footsteps from behind him. Oh no, it couldn’t be another Death Eater. As he whirled around, wand raised he caught sight of a huge figure moving toward him and he let out a noise of relief.
‘Hagrid…’ He called weakly.